The season for thoughtless gifts? Always has been, apparently...

[acroyear]

Did the Three Kings Bear Gift Receipts? - washingtonpost.com:

When Caspar, Balthazar and Melchior arrived at the manger on the first Christmas, they set a precedent that would withstand the test of time for every Christmas to come. Most of the gifts they brought were, at first glance, terrible.

Caspar, what were you thinking? Myrrh? The resin from a tiny shrub was used for embalming. It would be like presenting your bundle of joy with Dr. Science's Junior Mortuary Kit.

Balthazar hardly did better. His gift of frankincense was the first of many billions of thoughtless perfume presents. If you want to show someone you love them and have less than a minute to shop, buy them perfume.

But fortunately for Caspar and Balthazar, Melchior came through. The third king presented the Holy Family with the gift that classical economics has long suggested is best: gold. In other words, he gave them the money.

The author continues, discussing cash and gift cards:

Some social scientists make the case that too few of us take Melchior's logical step. One survey found that only about 9 percent of Christmas gifts are cash. Gift cards, which are like cash, have been surging in popularity but will probably account for only 5 percent of holiday sales this season. This drives economists crazy for a simple reason. Perhaps the most important tenet of their science is that people know their own preferences best. If you give someone money, she can go out and buy exactly what she wants. If you give her a gift, you may luck out and pick just what she would have purchased herself. Odds are, though, that you'll give her something she values less.

Actually there's also the aspect, for families with "big spenders" in the house (not naming names! ;) ) that there's also the possibility of giving them something that they already have, simply because you haven't been to the house recently to take an assessment.

I'd go into details, but, well, I'm not naming names here...

Comments

[queenmaggie.livejournal.com]

Let me play devil's advocate for the reasoning behind giving gifts, not cash or cards.
Number one, and the reason that I was taught, is that the gift itself is an indication of the thought and effort one puts out on another's behalf. Just giving cash is an easy way to deal with an obligation, not a way of saying 'I care about you, about what you like and I'm willing to spend time to make you happy'

Number two, a gift can be, and often is, something that one would not buy for oneself: an extra pleasure that people often aren't willing to indulge themselves in. I have, in the p[ast, received cash as a gift, and felt that I really ought to save it (just in case) rather than actually getting an item or a service that I would have enjoyed. People sometimes don't provide for themselves things they would value the most because of inhibitions or long taught 'rules' about money management that speak to fears rather than enjoyment.

And thirdly (and least, but still a point IMO) an involved giftgiver can often find items (or just stumble across them during their travels or daily lives) that wouldn't occur to the giftee, or that the giftee had never thought of nor conceived as possibilities.

[acroyear70.livejournal.com]

i probably should have mentioned, the article does go into the positive aspects of gifts vs cash, particularly on the second page. they cite a number of studies that college students would value a gift on average at more than twice what they might actually buy it for on ebay. the fact that it was a gift does add value between individuals, even though it doesn't necessarily add value to it in the open marketplace, as you say here.

(Granted, college students are a limited study group, with an acknowledged bias of restricted income and spending cash - they're more willing to hold out for "more cash" on an item even if it wasn't a gift, and they're very thrifty out of necessity for keeping cash for basics like beer money ;-) ).

as for "I'm willing to spend time to make you happy", this is a tricky place for me (and faireraven as well). yes we're willing to "spend time on someone", but our weekend obligation habits clearly show that we're more likely to want to "spend time with someone" than "on". this, of course, limits the amount of time we have to spending "on" those we can't be "with". (this weekend a case in point: 3 events, 3 different circles, all MDRF related: a Team Wench meeting, Hack-n-Slash's show, and a housewarming party for a certain liar - next weekend's worse with revels, a morris dance tour, o'danny's, latke-fest, and the possibility of an 18th century tea with faire friends @ gadsby's (we're on the waiting list)).

[queenmaggie.livejournal.com]

Wow. I wish we had so many choices! We're rather out of the way for a lot of the events.

[acroyear70.livejournal.com]

that's not to say we're not driving an hour or more for each of these, and (in last night's case) not getting home 'til 2am...

[dawntreader]

see below though, especially for my comment about k's mom and the Michael's gift card we bought her. she was SO happy with it. she carefully placed it in her wallet, scheduled a special trip where she could spend as much time as she wanted in the store, just to pick out whatever she felt like buying that she eventually made (and still has on display).

to say she doesn't indulge in things like that often is an understatement.

i do like well-thought out gifts, but i always feel terrible when i get something i honestly don't like or have no use for. i know it's the thought that counts and such, but where do we put those things in this already crammed apartment? and giving it away just seems like a waste for the gift giver. in those cases, i would have preferred they spend the money on themselves and not on me.

basically, i hate getting presents that say "we felt we had to buy you SOMETHING and this is what we came up with." in those instances, i prefer gift cards to cash. like you, cash i feel like i should save it or do something important with it. but a gift card? it's like being granted permission to indulge yourself. and everyone can benefit from a little of that... especially as a result of someone else's thoughtfulness. not to mention, they always fit! *g*