Another "too close to the truth" onion

[acroyear]

Red Meat May Spell Early Death | The Onion - America's Finest News Source:

A federal study revealed that middle-aged Americans who ate red meat at least once a day were 30 percent more likely to die during the 10 years researchers followed them. What do you think?

with the first (and best) reply being:

"This research may actually push Americans to adopt new habits, such as calling red meat something else."

Comments

[capi.livejournal.com]

hahahahahaha!!

I'm a carnivore.

Period. I like meat, and that's the way it is.

I will die when it's time for me to die. I am not sorry about that. We all die. We all die when it's time for us to die. What's the big deal?

[javasaurus.livejournal.com]

I'd like to think that I have some influence on when I die, that it's not already written in some astrally located stone.